Barsexuality is the new black.
Adam has been drinking
Who has his phone
Adam does
Karaoke makes my soul die one wretched song at a time
the first call I got in the morning was from visa fraud prevention so yeah it was one of those nights
i am doomed to only fuck guys with curved cocks
I said we should get a taxi and you were waving down cars, three of which were cops and one of them slowed down and shook his head then kept driving
He didn't think we needed a taxi
So glad I decided to show up and puke in your trashcan.
These are the moments that bond souls forever.
We hooked up with 2 friends last night as always and she stole their fucking cocaine and I just had to drive to their house and make her give it back to him hahshshahahah only me
Saw a girl outside my apartment shotgun a bud light, then a red bull, get in her Tahoe, and drive 4 people away. Gotta love thirsty Thursday.
I sat on the bathroom floor yelling "hell hath no fury!" for about 20 minutes.
It's definitely revenge time.
apparently I kept repeating I have a to do list this summer and he's on it
I just had a 30-minute convo with an irrelevant fuckboy from college who decided to tell me FOUR years later he’s sorry for sleeping with 3 girls at once including me.
im just letting you know I walked in on you with four different guys last night. a. you were all naked. b. they're all roommates
So how often do you needs to see my tits today then?
It was like he was 23 all over again. Madness. I. was. so. scared.
Randomize
