We discussed how the marijuana was making the dopamine float around our nucleus accumbens last night when we were high. Yet another example of how our science classes are perverting our good times.
Your mom can still drink beer standing on her head! Talk to you tomorrow :)
Mom wtf!?
well hello there hangover. fancy meeting you here on this BRIGHT thursday morning.
does drinking everclear count as brushing your teeth? because i think they are sterilized
look. either you want to have late night naked sleep overs or you don't. do not involve dinner and extraneous conversations in this relationship.
My girlfriend and my fuck buddy both started their periods this weekend. The good news is, neither of them are pregnant. The bad news is, I'll have to find someone else to fuck til next weekend. No wait.....that's good news too.
Even my vagina gasped.
She sat on the stairs and yelled sex positions at us. I don't remember if we went along with it but judging by the beer and condoms I'm thinking yes.
Him cheating on his girlfriend resulted in a $1500 hospital bill from repeated blows to his testicles by my ass. They diagnosed his pain as "testicle trauma". Sex karma at it's finest.
Has my life seriously led me to day drinking on a Monday the third week of the semester?
It's after 5, it's not day drinking.
Just retrieve me from the bathroom floor when you're done
Today's been pretty great, I went and bought the new Batman for the sole purpose of masturbating to Bane
I managed to get through my meeting without throwing up in someone else's office, so there's that for an accomplishment today.
I WOULD NEVER MIX DICK AND MCDONALDS
I think I accidentally got a sugar daddy but I was already planning on sleeping with him so I’m going to see where this goes
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