We were so bored at work tonight that we were in dry storage taking turns pouring the boxed wine we use for cooking into each others' mouths. I think I'm starting to understand the "problem" aspect of "drinking problem."
We named our saturday intramural dodgeball team "we're hungover". Pretty much just an excuse to fuel my alcoholism on friday nights.
Just got thank you sex for shoveling the driveway. I cant wait for the next blizzard
How do I tell my mom that she just went to the gym with my water bottle filled with vodka...
All she was asking was for you to describe your coat so she could get it, but you kept yelling at her so the security threw you out.
Ya I guess if we compared our actions now with our actions 2 years ago. We are definitely in a constant state of shit showness.
Sometimes you gotta say "hey, its been a long semester. Let's puke before 10"
I'm pretty sure they kept making references about gangbanging me but I was too stoned to catch on, I just sat there and stared at his kitten.
I think I should start a match.com profile and put "robe lounging" as my only hobby
While the bouncer was checking my purse, he found a bag of pasta noodles in it and asked me why I put them in my purse. I said to him: "So the guy knows I can cook."
dude, I convinced you I was your conscience for like 15 minutes last night. you weren't just "a little high"
Walked in on my roommate covering his dick in blue frosting. Am staying with my folks for the Forth. See you Monday if the brain bleach works.
2015 is a year for health and mental stability and alas we are not yet there so yolo
so my parents definitely heard me when I was cumming last night...
He gave me a brownie at the beginning of class and now I can't feel my face.
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