Going to bed naked. Too bad I am all alone. Need to make some changes. Either sleep with clothes or with you
you shoved the noah's ark of animal crakers in your mouth saturday.
Yet again my drunken self has managed to find his way into the middle of nowhere with no shoes or recollection of what happened last night.
Then I guess you don't remember me driving you there after you tried making out with my girlfriend, dipshit.
I'm still with the girl from last night. remember to call me conrad and that i work for PETA
the bride spent most of the night apologizing to people she had punched earlier.
looking back it was a good thing we were too wasted to fire up the chainsaw
If i pass out for a while at graduation, please atleast TRY to wake me?
Getting sick, pulled the filter off a camel crush and rolled it into my joint to clear my sinuses. If there were stoner awards, I'd receive one.
No. I heard a cover of "my heart will go on". This is not sanity.
I vaguely remember hanging my bra off the ceiling fan and chugging a beer during sex
College has turned you into quite the multi tasker huh?
Have you ever just woke up in the morning and felt pregnant
stoners and superglue do NOT mix
We took your mom out drinking and we wound up winning 18 games of Flip Cup. You have amazing genetics.
Are you really trying to argue your case that you seduced my cat?
when I said eat the rich I didn't mean like that but here we are sucking that capitalist dick
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