There is a new fb quiz: "are you at ypical woman, future ex or from crazy town" - should i take it?
Aren't all three of those the same though?
Goddamn it, are you fucking her sister?
did you know it's going to storm tonight?
You bitch. At least tell Laura she's a better kisser.
I'm on my fifth double. This night is getting better whether it likes it or not.
you cant keep talent like that locked up in a relationship
It was going well until he told me about the 7k he made in college to be in a gay porn
just peed on the 7/11 floor and casually left. Omg so drunk
I've never seen a homeless man jog to get off the bus and then run to his panhandling spot because he's "late for work," but you see something new every day.
Oh, and I'm only keeping her around till spring. Doing the hunt for cunt is too tough in 12" of snow.
I have a cut on my head from a tambourine.
I found someone's tooth on the stairs when I was vacuuming, and my sister found a catheter in the men's bathroom... this cleaning job is dangerous
Ok. So let me get this straight. She treats her vagina like a clown car, yet judges me for just making out with the guy that bought all of us shots?
So I definitely fucked a guy while holding on to his pigtails like reigns last night.
The most literal cowgirl position ever.
Would you still love me and fuck me doggie style if I had a dinosaur tramp stamp?
In other news, I just sent her a video of me masturbating while driving in the rain, so I guess you could say I've mastered Snapchat
When you realized the door was unlocked, you did the mission impossible yheme song and snuck into the bathroom. And continued it while you peed.
Randomize
