People are allowed to visit it's just they can't be from Germany and have to wear masks.
I just bought the big bottle of Patron. It looks small. What have I done with my life?
Succeeded.
I just woke up with a girl who has left and right tattoed on her wrists. In french. I may need to stop drinking.
i asked a few people if they wanted to make pancakes with me but no one would. thats why i'm drunk by myself right now
As a matter of principle, I waited until noon to start the drinking binge.
I woke up with my bra stapled to the ceiling, her dad was in the hallway winking at me. I was the less drunk of the bunch.
Still not exactly sure how i unbolted your toilet from the ground.
We made the pizza boy do Jell-o shots with us. He didn't even deliver to our house, we just called him over from the neighbors
I need you to stand in the corner and ref this threesome. Wear stripes.
i convinced her i need a blow job every morning to wake up because i have a medical condition.
well we called the liquor store to tell them to stay open five more minutes so we could make it and they recognized our voices. I've never been more proud.
It was one of those nights where you get back from the bar and end up staying up till 3AM beating off to facebook photos of girls from college
I need to get off of her emotional roller coaster. I've been on it for a fucking year and I've been throwing up the entire time.
I peed in front of kids, unfortunately
Yes ma'am. I'm attracted to unconventional people, you know that.
True. I can't judge, half of my sexual partners I only know a false first name & a number. We all have our kinks.
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