Dude, Her having kids just means she puts out.
Lady with a stroller in a bar. Think she's out of my league?
i'm having a wet tshirt contest with myself and yet i'm still losing
Is he smart?
Why would i know that. That would deal with the top half of his body. I only deal with the bottom half.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Thought I woke up to a girl giving me a handy. It was a male nurse inserting a catheter.
This place doesnt have redbull or serve shots. Its like they are at war with fun.
Not a single person will look me in the eye. Last night must've been bad.
Don't judge me. If you're going to fall off a bed you might as well do it gracefully into a bag full of beer.
I'm sorry I tried putting my balls in your cup holder.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
by the way- Brandy out of a doggy bowl was AMAZING
My fall semester strategy is to submit my papers with a nude selfie
You've got post-grad studies written all over you
Get off me. I'm done. I want a cookie.
Drunkenly making hamburger helper. I just whispered "I can't wait to have you in my mouth."
God I need to hump something, right now.
His idea of hot sex is sticking his finger in my dark star while doing me Missionary style. You can tell he's from the Bible Belt.
Does he smell like BBQ?
Inside and out.
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