so I'm never txting u again after today...
y?
cuz i don't wanna see it on blogspot :)
ha...too late
Considering the face that your still in jail Im gunna go with no.
Drunk and had dance off with 8 year old. Lost. Still drinking
It's my birthday, I plan on masturbating and boating, maybe even masturbate on the boat.
i know im back at school when i can poke any random spot on my body and expect a 80% chance that theres a bruise there
once you started introducing yourself as "running-bear" i knew you were beyond fucked up
I really hope jumping jacks prevent pregancy because I'm kind of banking on it right now, do you know why there's a unicycle in the corner of my room?
Dance move was taxi-ing on the runway then taking off in a plane. All the boys wanted to beat you up cause they were like "who is this angel flapping her arms like a bird in the bar i must have her"
I will have you again some day my love. And our divorce will be magnificent
HOLD ONTO YOUR PANTIES AND SAY GOODBYE TO THE REMAINDER OF YOUR INTEGRITY
It was really strange. I feel like I had sex with a synchronized swimmer.
You poured 151 in your eye, ran face first into a tree, fell down, then threw a lawn chair at the dog...all before passing out in the hallway and pissing yourself. There is no way to redeem yourself.
You peed in a public fountain and then felt bad so you put dish soap in it; 4 ft tall bubbles.
Ya can’t just go throwing accusations around about someone pooping their pants without some hard evidence
Not sure she's stomping around my apartment muttering incoherently about wanting to speak to the colonel
Randomize
