He's not gay. He just has bad gaydar and he gaydared himself and was wrong.
last night was fun... but i spent all morning tring to get the candle wax out of my chest hair. We did use candles last night?
he is training for a marathon but can't last more than five minutes on top. worst tuesday night ever
Gross thing of the day...i got cum in my new boots
The world would have a new energy source if someone would just take a blacklight to the backseat of that slut's car
2011 senior yearbook drinking game. we're taking a shot whenever some dumbass uses that quote about how life isn't isn't about the breaths you take, but the moments that take your breath away. also that retarded wayne gretzky one about missing shots you don't take.
I concluded last night that you have no tear ducts, heart, or sense of any feeling.
Dude, Donte totally wants it. I don't have any idea how I do it. I'm not even cool. I'm not even the hero Gotham deserves. I'm barely high. My hands are swelling. Want me to pick you up anything from five guys?
THERE IS AN ENORMOUS FAT WOMAN EYEING MY FLIGHT'S GATE LIKE IT WOULD BE DELICIOUS TO EAT.
I smell like bonfire and ex-boyfriends
Watching Supernatural does more for me sexually than the physical encounters with 90% of the men in my life.
When did we go from stumbling drunk into an ER at 3am to dinner double dating?
I couldn't even tell you how many times I've said "wrong hole" today
It's not my fault, Tequila turned all my alarms off.
I either have food poisoning or I'm pregnant. Either way, I NEED JESUS!
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