I can only name 15 people I've had sex with - can I just start claiming that as my sex number?
I think i found my new favorite workout. Go to a party where you dont know anybody and constantly walk around the house so you dont look awkward standing alone. im up to 1.8 miles
It was the most graceful puke ever. I just thought she dropped something underneath the bar until she told me what happened.
Found myself carrying 2 bottles of .89 euro wine about half a mile to where im staying. and someone stopped me and spoke to english. apparently, i reek of drunk american.
what is the protocol for being hungover enough to vomit in a potted plant during my botany lecture?
i'm soo broke, the only trip i can afford for spring break is acid
I just gave a bum a ride back to his bench. Columbus is weird but I like it.
Maybe she'll change her mind but the "go fuck yourself" doesn't seem promising
My card got declined when I tried to buy dippin dots at 2 am, the lady gave them to me for free because "I looked like I needed them."
Sorry for yelling at you, I'm just really emotional about missing comicon.
Someone just asked me why I drink so much. Im gonna slap a bitch
I just want you to know that i deffinately saw the baby clothes, and didn't freak out and still had sex with him. I'm going to hell.
So I took my bra off and threw it in the bushes before we went to the bars..
I think I'm taking after my dog, I just want to hump everything
How are they?
Amazing! These new boobs are going to break blouse buttons and wedding vows!
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