my phone cant type all the emotion im having
I'm watching Cheaper By The Dozen. I almost forgot that Hilary Duff was a really shitty actor before she was a really shitty singer.
so i never found you. but i found vodka. so its kinda the same
My cousin had a baby so we have to look at it. Apparently the event is byob
Pretty sure I just became the first person ever to use the word "boner" in a wedding card...
Did the math... it's Magna Cum Laude whether I get a 4.0 or a 0.0 this semester. I'm blacking out now, wake me up when I have to walk across the stage,
I just had a 30 minute conversation about hummingbirds. That high.
I miss high conversations.
Swinging. Is. Amazing.
Your mom won me $100 and you showed me your tits. Solid evening.
There's someone howling in the parking lot. Haha.
Of course I have a pirate flag
I don't want anything calamari shaped after last night. But I appreciate the Cheerios offer.
He knows whenever I get drunk I'm going to call him and make fun of his major. Its like a reverse booty call.
I sleep better at night when I win things. I never really weep for others.
We dont have cups... so were doing shots out of bowls like puppies
Yeah. 11 people shoved in a clown car for a 1 hour party. I'm too old for house parties.
Randomize
