Shaq going to Cleveland; Vince Carter to the Magic; Michael Jackson, Farrah Fawcett, and Ed McMahon die.... ARMAGEDDON IS UPON US!!!!!
I woke up to a topless girl handing me a blunt. Candidate for greatest wake-up ever?
Well he has a girlfriend. So I told him that I wanted to have sex way more than I wanted to be a decent human being.
Who's nuvaring is under my pillow?
25 Disturbing Facts That Will Make You Question Everything
He was president of his frat and had a clap on disco ball in his room... or course I slept with him
Its like no one cares im drunk naked wet and ready to throw myself at some one hold on i found a solution to my problems
I love pie. Pie understands me and the spatula
I just find it funny that nobody ever threatens to call the cops on us until we have a Harry Potter party
He kept humping my leg and whispering "dont worry, thats my phone not my penis"
It would have to be recorded, because that sex tape would be humanity's primary evidence of miracles
We should get Al Michaels to provide commentary for it.
31 People Admit To Nasty Things They Do On The Reg
I'm 50% sure my cousin put weed in these deviled eggs.
Pretty sure that propositioning you to fly across the country for sex fest '13 isn't something my husband would approve of.
Landen experienced Greenville for the first time last night. He was awaken by 2 cops and 4 EMS guys this morning in the bed of that truck that is for sale at the swashbuckler carwash, said he was trying to walk to waffle house... Greenville- 1, Landen- 0
I walked out in my coconut bra, and that's when it all went downhill.
I think she tried to suffocate me with her tits...she almost succeeded.
He told me that he wants to fuck me only wearing a princess tiara...How could I possibly say no to that?