Yeah. Fortunately, the road to Hell is paved with naked 21 year old girls.
Which beats the fuck out of good intentions.
I mean, she is a dancer for the Suns. If I didnt fuck her that would just be bad team spirit.
My mom and I were trying to explain to my sister what an uncircumcised penis looks like. We had some minor disagreements.
she left out the fact that she had a kid until she told me not to suck on her tits too hard or milk would come out.
Im about to shotgun a beer using my mother's knitting needles. home sweet home.
Please don't let me drink ever again. I apparently told him he could stay but as there was no room in the bed he'd have to lie on top of me and he'd need to anchor himself on with his penis so he didn't fall off.
I can feel myself smiling like 10 minutes after I stop smiling, and that's just like... so awesome.
I sincerely thought making it to McDonalds by 10:00am was a shoe-in but it appears that I need to adjust my zoom when looking at the map before walking to places.
Im calling you paparazzi cause of all the dick pics you take of your one night stands ps loved the panoramic one!
The dysfunction is strong in this one.
I told you for Halloween we just need to let the loins free! Let the girth come to us in a flock, drenched with passion!
We will just distract him with tacos and porn.
I possibly am a tad bit not really but maybe slightly intoxicated.
I'm "drunk text both siblings" drunk.
There is this guy in here. He didn't even get ice cream he just filled up his cup with mini marshmellows, chocolate syrup, about a lb of grahm cracker crumbs and walked around to everyone in the shop saying "hey, hey look here, I just made fucking s'mores." He was SO proud of himself.
Randomize
