she was definitely a virgin. no ones that bad unless theyre a virgin
your sister was..
New thing to add to the list of never wanted to talk about with my grandma: sweating in ur crouch and vag area
i called my mom using *69 and said this was the principal and Matt has a snow a day today. she believed me.
Went to use to bathroom and walked in on karaoke. Two girls singing "a whole new world" to each other in the shower. I'm gonna miss this place in the summer
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
are you excited because you wanna see me or because you wanna get laid?
bc i get to see you. naked.
I said you have to fuck the german guy and take one for the team...it's a once in a lifetime opportunity you know.
Back of his car in the Starbucks parking lot WITH HIS APRON STILL ON. Check and Mate.
Holy shit. You won barista bingo AND the Triple Crown in one day.
When you pick me up at the airport, please have some sort of drugs on hand.
I feel like you're the reason public nudity is illegal and generally frowned upon in society
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The house hit rave levels when La Bamba came on which confuses me because I live in white suburban Canada
PARA BAILAR LA BAMBA ASSHOLES
You're officially the most high maintenance man I've ever had inside me.
I actually haven't slept with anyone in a while. I think my whore phase is just seasonal.
So I figured out why that guy from Tinder stopped messaging me back. He got married.
And on the way out from Applebee's he tried to take the basket of toothpicks claiming he was using them as a tax write off. Last time I babysit my dad on thirsty Thursday.
She grabbed a $20 bill out of my hand, calling it a lap dance coupon and then she dragged me into her bedroom. I think I’m in love
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