Dude i fell asleep inside of her
thats awesome
i'm signing you up for texting rehab
I just woke up and shes still asleep next to me with her vibrator inside her and on. Whats normal protocol for this situation?
Found my little brother jerking off with a condom. he said he was "practicing"
OMG its one we used last night
She said she wanted to have closure sex.
Freshman Move In Day, its like Christmas in August.
Dude, how the hell did you become an RA?
I didn't hate myself when I woke up today, that's improvement right?
i now officially have to be stoned in order to look like my passport when i go to a different country
I want him in the "you're a terrible idea and are probably going to get me killed by my parents, my siblings, and my boyfriend" way
No more drinking with Em. She was on the ground so much she looked like she belongs in a lifealert commercial
I wish the sun would stop judging me for being drunk while it's still shining.
WHY IS IT FROWNED UPON THE DRESS UP IN CAT COSTUMES AND SIT OUTSIDE OF BARS WITH A BOX OF WINE I THOUGHT THIS WAS AMERICA
The ONLY place I sext is in my anatomy class. It's an amped up level of playing doctor.
There is nothing worse then the feeling after you've held in farts all night..
What's his name?
WTF DOES CAROLINE HAVE GLASS IN HER FACE
Randomize
