Saw some pubes in our toilet, hope the new look works out tonight.
Do u kno any dealers?
I've officially lost all respect for you, dad.
I FOUND THE PROF I'M GOING TO FUCKKKK.
One of my friends found 6 bags of gummy bears on the roof. He lives a building over. Apparently even hammered you still have quite an arm
I don't care how hungover you are were not listening to enya
The lesbians are drunkenly meowing in the hallway again. This is the shit I'll miss at home.
Its not christmas eve unless I give him head. I wont take no for an answer
he stopped midthrust to put on his sex playlist and the first song was 'can you feel the love tonight'
where do you find these guys?
Morning yack off the fire escape. Girl walking by was mortified. Gooooooooo Ducks!!
I want to be you.
Did you mean to cry when you finished last night? Or were you just that drunk?
I AM HANGING OUT WITH ADORABLE DOGS SURROUNDED BY NATURE. GOD BLESS AMERICA AND ALSO BYE CIVILIZATION AND PANTS.
Are you at a park?
Then he shook the next streetlight but this one broke and fell over. He told me, "This is the part where we run."
You literally chaperoned my booty call.
Should I wear my "kiss me I'm highrish" shirt for my drug screen today?
My nipples are YOUNG and they need TWISTING
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