"tonights gonna be a goodnight" was blasting at the club while i was screaming "NO ITS NOT" and crying. How do you think it went?
i cant talk right now. we are trying to finish our homework so we can play with play-doh
his tattoo said carpe diem which i thought was ironic considering his epilepsy
We have a drunk bartender with her nips a quarter inch from bein out buying us shots. GET HERE.
You just said the magic words
Am I allowed to say that I would really enjoy blowing you again? Or does that fall into the "nothing changes between us" catagory?
there was a fucking fire juggler. but it was ok bc i was in the kiddie pool and it was the safe zone
Look if you're not going to be mine and take care of my needs, I'm going to fuck your sisters.
He handled me like a finger puppet on crack... Time to ice the vagina, I'd like to sit down sometime today.
Hypothetically going to the gym on coke was a good idea
DR UNK TOWN USA
TEAM USA GO AMERICA
I consider myself to be an upstream bisexual
You're the salmon of the gays...
I wrapped my scarf around his head and then made him go down on me
And I also said, "probe me"
Jesus I should have learned from my first marriage not to get married again
He was telling me about how he's leaving on his Mission next week... While we were having sex in the back of his car.
I gave his daughter swim lessons and in exchange he sold me an ounce. I feel so accomplished.
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