at a bar and heard one girl tell another her tampon string was showing she goes i dont want it in anymore anyways. then proceeds to pull out her tampon in the middle of the bar and leave it on a plate. ewwww
whatever. i fb stalked him and his pic comments are witty. so i'm going for it.
her night didn't end so well, both of her boyfriends got arrested... together.
You didn't see us wave? How could you not? We were all going like 10mph screaming at you. We were stoned and didnt wanna run over pedestrians
I was so drunk. I apparently did a flip over the balcony using it as monkey bars. Ya I hurt a bit today
I feel like letting the same guy who shot him dig the pellet out of his leg with a pocket knife was the bigger mistake
I'm all about sex. But even I know there will be a time to retire my junk. And that will be my 40th birthday, or whenever I'm hideous
I will also take that commission in the form of weed. Pass that on to the asst. manager.
I don't know man, I have to ask my girlfriend if I can borrow my balls from her purse.
Ummm, my mojito just spilled on 2 essays as I'm grading. Who says high schoolers have all the fun?
i was the only bi girl at the frat party. i felt like the last cresent roll at thanksgiving
I didn't pop out of a cake in a speedo with diagrams
In case that's what u were picturing
I woke up to Elf. I don't know which one of you put that in my DVD player when I passed out but I appreciate you.
After I spend a passionate night with my vibrator, I have to awake and face my stuffed animals. Their beady eyes are full of shame and disappointmet. I can't deal with that level of judgement.
isnt it crazy how for years we were living our owns lives, and now only a wall seperates us?
stop. eating. my. shrooms.
Randomize
