Hey when you come over to pick me up in the mornin bring a camera. This is going to be legendary. Don't knock.... They might cover up
Wow anytime a scalper has i need tix written on the back of a franzia box thats a trusted seller
So I've been to the library twice so far. Both times were for the atm, and once I was stoned. Junior year is going great.
All i've done since I got back to my room today is take a three hour nap. Like, I even planned to change my pants and haven't even done that yet.
Yea, i was tied up and blindfolded. And someone was throwing chicken nuggets at my face.
I know I'm her Sunday school teacher. I just feel I would be saving others from a lot of headaches by telling her someday she's going to be a stripper
Those foam number one hands, are the BEST socks.
He said in a slur "I go so hard, even when I..." and cut himself off by projectile vomiting all over the ice luge.
He has pizza coupons and a hammer next to his toilet.
our flight took off 8 am and the bar didn't close til 5, so we decided it was a good idea to just stay out all night. Drunk logic is awesome. We were all scared we wouldn't get let onto the plane
Best sex of my life. But I think it's because I like his apartment. Really nice bed sheets. High vaulted ceilings. I wanted to lay there forever.
You're getting old. Was it located in a nice school district for your future offspring?
I tolerate his mediocre drunk sex for the mind blowing morning sex. More than worth it.
He has no idea he's waking up in slut palace tomorrow morning
driving home hungover today was like a life test..it was like the goblet of fire
I'm keeping him.
Sex was good?
I had to tap out three times. There aren't words for how much better than "good" that is.
Randomize