the point i decided it was time to leave was when i was on the floor of the bar, after taking her down with me, and a table.
Why are you covered in frosting?
Friend's birthday situation turned into enlightened cake orgy.
That's unfortunate. Distance can be a stoner's greatest enemy.
You make it sound like a battle for Middle Earth.
He's afraid of heights. How do I know, you ask? Blowjob on his roof.
He's a huge toolbag douche loser with a below average dick who doesn't know how to treat a girlfriend. He was my rebound after Brady. It was a pitiful 1 month rebound "extravaganza"
I agreed not to hook up with any randoms while she's on vacation, if that isn't a show of good faith then I don't know what is...
No judgement. Sometimes you gotta twerk on a legends face.
He told me I have nice nipples. You can't just tell someone that and then leave the state!
We had sex six times. In a span of 8 hours. Confirmation I don't need to go to the gym.
we had a "who's sex playlist is better?" fight.....
I swear I get as excited about the sound of a condom wrapper as my cat gets when she's getting a can of food.
You know more about his cock specs than his childhood. Proud of you
I mean, if I asked you, would you cum on cotton candy for me?
You took a bite of the snack wrap put it down and fell asleep and when you woke up ten minutes later you asked how it got there, dipped it in soda ate it and fell back asleep.
It's like the perfect sandwich, once you find it you want to ensure your future access to it.
Randomize
