My main thought on the Olympics: I need LESS cowbell.
If I won't even leave the house for sex tonight. I definetly not going out for anything else.
Sorry I pulled the thermostat off the wall..
Swallowing. Like you said. Lions. Always.
you said candy land and then passed out.
ps. we found your stash in the candyland game. Thanks.
Woke up naked wearing mismatched earrings. Didn't even make it to the bar.
I've slipped into the part of my life where I am not having sex to get Phils tickets from this chick. I need to seriously rethink my life decisions
i think i just asked a donut if it was ok
Only thig bad about that muscular chick from the gym is she liked it so rough I had to bust out a few wrestling moves from highschool
I need a good cry or an orgasm and neither of them are gonna happen to me and i'm so frustrated
Stay positive! You think people like sad vaginas? NO! You'll get some!
NO. NONE OF THAT. SHAME ON YOU.
I have to sleep with him. We're too much alike. It's like clash of the titans, except instead of clashing, he's putting it in me.
I'm covered in glow paint and shame. I'm never leaving this country
Thanks for loaning me your shower and panties. My hubby is awesome, but I shouldn’t go home commando, smelling like lube and sperm again
Randomize
