i just realized i put more money and effort into 420 then i did for christmas
This is going to be a 3 day beach sex fest. Do you understand
God forbid we drive unregistered mopeds without license plates on a pedestrians only sidewalk without goggles while flipping off passing cars.
I mostly enjoyed dancing with him because his boner was scratching my bug bites.
just found out I caught the bouquet at the wedding. I win for being the drunkest yet most functional bridesmaid.
In case you're keeping score at home, this is Brad's SECOND Doritos-related trip to the ER.
I think it really helped to be hungover at accepted students day. it gave me a good feel for how it would be everyday if I go there.
The bend and snap? 98% success rate of getting attention. When used appropriately, it has an 83% rate of return on a dinner invitation.
I'm just waiting for the avalanche of beef.
i just googled coccaine effects on sexual performance..maybe im dating the wrong guy
Give me 20 minutes.. I'm going to need to start off with an orgasm to get through this day
It's 2017. Get with the program. Also remind me never to get margaritas with you ever on Cinco de Mayo.
I was walking out of the bar when he said I'll see you later and I said I'll see you in my dreams and then fell face first and broke my nose
as a self proclaimed hoe im ok with a lotta things but that is not fucking one of them
Have you had an orgasm with an n95 mask on yet? It was better than being choked.
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