How bad was it?
You ran around telling everyone that you were going to click them to death on google earth
Do you know a sam ****, im at the bar right now and lookin for some dirt on her to guilt trip her in to sex
Is it weird I want to fuck the cartoon chick from e-surance??
You kept referring to your penis as "this guy."
Im pretty sure it started going awry when I asked their mom "How much would it cost me to sleep with your daughters"
She found 60 bucks at the strip club. Its probabably been in a vagina but really most money probably has
I shouldn't trust a guy I just met with the pull out method. That's a big responsibility.
Oh God! I'm naked from the waist down playing records. Too drunk. I don't even know what to do.
Balls out but with a shirt on. Eating ravioli. I don't know how to deal with this.
Did i actually sleep there? Or did i just get sand everywhere?
I'm making him come over again tonight. I don't know how long this thing will last so I want to spend as much time with his dick as possible.
I went eBay shopping last night. Turns out I brought a Viking drinking horn. I can't even be mad.
I saved a note for myself but all it said was "am I a slutty Holden Caulfield?"
I think he has some internal "man stuff" that keeps getting in the way.
Like alcoholism and general douchbagary.
I was amazing, unlike anything he's ever experienced. I somehow made him feel young and old.and he never felt old before. He feels I will literally kill him. With my magic, lethal vagina.
It just so happens all of their names are Ryan, so I never have to change whose name I moan.
Randomize
