I'm drive I can fine osifer
i could totally date him if i was just drunk the whole relationship
Just did a kegstand with my dad. Happy fathers day.
Seriously this night has "go home now before you cry, puke or scream on someone" written all over it.
Ohmygod. I don't know if I can explain how great it'll be. I hope you don't mind Subaru sex
Is he gonna be my crazy ex? Cause we weren't even together for as long as my weeklong bicurious lesbian relationship.
We took her out for fresh air and next thing we knew, she was stumbling around the backyard picking dead leaves up off the ground and putting them in her shirt to "save them".
no it was
but you compared your dick to a female disney character
Fuck you and fuck your stupid hat
This was the first funeral I've ever attended where I had to pee behind a bush cuz someone was passed-out drunk in the locked bathroom. Steve would have been proud.
I need to go home for the safety of everyone in a 10 mile radius, especially me
I think someone shaved off all their pubes in the handicap stall or a werewolf stopped by the office to take a crAzy dump!
I woke up in nothing but my socks and my hat a cigarette in my mouth and a beer in my hand..........GREAT NEW YEARS
Well I just masturbated while reading a recipe for Alfredo sauce so I guess you could say I’m growing up
I don’t have enough daddy issues for this shit, make him go away
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