I found your undies. They were wrapped around my leg.
Funny, my mom didn't get it when I said 'that's what she said' after she said 'it's so thick, it's impossible' in reference to my milkshake
Helping a hot freshman girl move in = 2 hours of my life One bottle of cheap vodkas = $10 Watching her do the walk a shame on her first morning away from home = Priceless
where are you?
sonic
Good. I hungoveredly cleaned your room. This is what being married is going to be like. I pick the condoms up off the floor and you bring home the hot dogs.
We did a shot for each one. Father... son... and holy ghost. That wasn't enough though so we moved on to toasting dead relatives.
I fucked her and then she made me sleep on the floor next to her bed because she 'has a committment problem'
Do you knowwwwww you never ha to pee while lhr on eztacy
we found him. outside on the balcony, sitting on a bucket, with his pants off, swearing he was'nt taking a dump
Hahah fuck. I keep looking to make sure that stupid line doesn't show up when my guards are down. Babies can sense fear.
I GOT A VENDING MACHINE FOR OUR LIVING ROOM
I look like one classy bitch running in heels through my backyard while carrying a small dog and a large bottle of booze. How am I still single?
Seems like you've kicked summer 2012 off well.
The least you could do is send me some gibberish so I know you're alive.
Fuhga
Thank you.
Dude they're making a condom for people who have no feeling in their penises that will make them able to have an orgasm. I love science
with the possibility that i could very easily fall in love with him and i've actually talked to my HUSBAND about it
did I ever tell you about my gay jesus theory?
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