It doesn't have to be a walk of shame...just pretend he took you to breakfast.
No one shows this much boob at breakfast
Didn't tell him I was on my period. Then had to surreptitiously remove some uterine lining from his cock.
She should get an extra 30 days for that Georgia Rule movie......terrible.
he pretended not to hear me say our safety word. how do you think I feel?
Nothing says I've got my life together like buying a jumbo bottle of 7$ wine in sweat pants on a monday night
There's a 24 hour period after giving head where you can't eat penis shaped food without me laughing at you
I just asked the contractor building my house what it would cost to put a garbage disposal in all the shower drains...there was a lot of judging going on.
well.. I tried flushing my sandals down the toilet
Jordan and I are drunk and barred out at the liquor store sitting in the awesome $70 Corona bench bargaining with the owner for a lower price, all while passing the Belvedere bottle between the two of us. Real life. College has down this.
I sang again at the bar lastnight I don't think alanis morrset knew when she wrote you outta know that the drunk version was going to be go fuck yourself Josh and Chelsea. I love $2 wells.
I've already made the "blackout on move in day" decision
So, seriously. How does it feel to know that you're riding a cock that was in kindergarten when you were going to prom?
My mom just offered to be my designated driver tonight. I love being an adult.
Apparently you can unlock an iPad by doing a line on the lock screen I'm about to bust that myth
Baby Shark came on during sex.
She has BABY SHARK on her sex playlist. Who does that?
Randomize
