I haven't had sex in so long I'll probably find some stranger, feel guilty, go w/o sex for several months and do it all over again...always something to look forward to
I researched the whole pregnancy breast feeding with piercings. I think you dont have to worry about the trifecta milk spraying thing.
Dude she was 62...with a boob job. And I'm proud to say I made out with that.
I just had sex on a bear rug. My life is complete.
The guy in the next stall screamed courtesy flush and then puked. Bless you Vegas
i dont know what was worse.. snorting the wasabi or puking on the neighbors dog
should I tell them that both of them had sex with me last Saturday? it might be a relationship builder type of thing you know?
Just turned down sex because it's a holy day of obligation, my mom would be proud.
jut tell him gently that you'd rather spend more time with his dick than his face
Like how hard is it to come up to me with chocolate and wine and say "hey, you're beautiful. Wanna marathon Doctor Who in sweatpants?" Hell yes!
What good is being a girl if you can't terrorize boys with pregnancy scares??
Omg. Tonight might be the night I masturbate thinking of a smoothie!
can we not speak foreign languages when I'm on drugs
You chased a rabbit then knocked on a police car and asked the cop "if he saw where that little bastard went."
I don't know who's idea it was to get wine for a frat party but my poor pitiful hung over self really fucking hates them.
Randomize