Tell your sister I'm no fool. Or at least romanticize the notion of the fool.
Fun fact: he pulled out my nuva ring while he was fingering me.. he looked really confused at me and it a couple of times, so i just said "surprise! not only is it good for pleasure, it's also really handy for storing plastic toys." I'm thinking he's definately gonna call.
I'm not to broken up about it. Our relationship was worse than a coldplay song.
Redeem this text for a blowjob
When you want to head down the cleveland on Sunday?
What time do the bars open? I dont want to remember how bad theyre gonna lose
My plan for valentine's day: take a shot for every guy I've slept with. To keep me from going to the hospital I'm only doing half a shot for small dicks
I think i found piece of your tooth in my dick this morning when i took a shower
i want to major in coloring with an emphasis on crayons.
so finals studying is going well?
He couldn't stand on his own, but he managed to somehow to get to the beer garden and get served 3 more. I'm proud to call him my cousin.
I'm going to make a mold of my tits to bake a cake for him for our anniversary.. I can see the pride in his eyes now.
just used my sex toy cleaning solution to clean my reading glasses. midterms are cramping my styleeee
just run out there and shit all over the driveway when he comes.. and then point at him
Bad things happen to those who bang their lab partner at the beginning of the semester.
WHY DID YOU NOT OFFER TO LET HIM STAY
Dude, it's like you want him inside me more than i do
He was 6'8" - I shit you not! He sat up in my bed and the ceiling fan got him right in the forehead.
Randomize
