yeah i was sneaking up to her room and on the way i saw a picture of her and left
he's my edward cullen
I am pretty sure Edward Cullen never had an all-day drinking binge topped off with some blow.
I would really like to get high with Bill Nye. I'm being dead serious. Every step I take is literally a step I take because it will take me closer to Science Guy high.
We could get him to build Inspector Gadget.
I didn't know you were high TOOOO!!!
You discussed the Arab/Israeli conflict with the guy behind the counter at the Kebab shop telling him you supported his people. He was clearly Asian.
I am sitting on my kitchen floor drunk with a bottle of jose cuervo, tryin to make cinnamon rolls and write a paper. I love college
Well I scaled a 3 story building last night to get laid. What have u done for ur penis lately?
The moral of the story is do not hire me because everything will end up smelling like pickles and I will not sufficiently clean it up.
Think I pulled my pelvic muscle.
I think I pulled my ashamed of myself muscle.
our relationship was basically a one night stand, with a three week long, morning after
Well she got high, deleted the essay she was working on, and then ordered dominos. We all manage stress in different ways.
Flatmate got laid for the first time in 3 years. I'm baking a cake.
Bring me a cialis. .. I feel like having a super dick today
I might as well walk around wearing a sandwich board and accept the fact that I'm dying single.
you know maybe it wouldnt be so bad if it hadnt happened before. At least I didnt blow him this time
Get to the bar now. Ryan is single again and every skank on campus that has heard story about his dick is circling like a shark. A cock hungry shark
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