your room smells of hookers.
And success
I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! Live in the flesh!
Ha Ha the cop that just pulled me over would like me to tell you hi!
Sorry about your blender, your tiolet, your weed, and your dog...
I'm eager to hear this explaination.
September 16th, captains log. I awoke in a daze, not sure of my location
filling out my bracket based on schools with ppl I've hooked up with
College is the ONLY place where you can pass off morning sickness as being hungover. I'm currently pouring beer in a spray bottle so I can spray it on myself and smell drunk.
Are we sharing a room, or can I pack my vibrator?
Yes to both. We'll use the workout rotation from dorm life.
Wait. Wine + Crossbow..?
Dude where are you? I've been here an hour and all I've done is get head from a random in the stairwell.
I've never said "lesbians" so many times in a short response answer
Rough day
Good thing I've started drinking again
.... I'm on a random couch somewhere in Newark wrapped in a Lightning McQueen blanket
Girl you're stalking so hard you're gonna know both their social security numbers soon
I think the cats may be lesbians. It could just be a two hour mutual bath but it sure looks like a 69.
Randomize
