i can't put facebook on my resume under hobbies.
I get free beer too. Its called a vagina and its accepted everywhere like visa
Pretty sure I just has te same conversation as you. He suggested I get, sell, and fuck the hoes, and once all was said and done, that I should refer afforementioned hoes to him, to perform felatio.
There's a girl sitting in front of me making a PowerPoint on Jack Bauer.
We found her in the fireplace eating dog biscuits.
You made a course evaluation for your vagina? Wow. You really are a professor now.
I'm not leaving my family to go to a strip club on good friday.
I fell down the stairs while taking the dog out last night. I was laying there with the dog licking me face and my neighbor just stepped over me
you slapped the bag of goldfish out of her hands and screamed, "BITCH THIS AINT NO AQUARIUM". That's how fucked up
I have a rash on my arm from the cat litter. Think the cat will be mad that I peed in its box?
just wanted to eat pizza off his dick so he let me and he can never forget it
It is such a beautiful day to not be arrested
He a gives rim jobs, because, of course a guy who opens doors and makes reservations would lick your anus..like a gentleman.
I feel like you're the sexual bearcat I've always wanted to be.
How you run into a glAss door three times in a row I do not know
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