so high. i feel like my whole body is a boner
I wish there was a facebook app that filtered my notifications to show only the ones having to do with people who'll fuck me.
I've been here 20 minutes and some creepy old man told me he wanted to know what my insides felt like. I hate gay bars.
despite contrary belief, getting peanut butter off your balls is not as easy as it sounds
She is only going home with him in hopes to give him herpes. She has been plotting some master revenge since 7th grade.
just bought 2000 rhinestones and a heart shaped stencil at Micheals...I think the cashier knows i'm Vajazzling
I feel like I just need to fuck him after all his effort. like a "hey man good try" like those kids who get last place and still get a trophy.
Maybe it's the vicodin, but all I wanna do is hunt wild hogs.
My only expectation is honesty. And three orgasms every time.
It was awful. Their identical twins so it was like having sex with Jeff wearing a wig and shaved legs.
It wasn't so much skinny dipping. It more like skinny walking...through a fountain.
If by "Are you high?" u mean "Did you just pass out at Genghis Grill walking to your table and falceplant?" the answer is yes.
I was afraid someone would drug test my pants so you set them on fire.
There are regrets.. and there are RAGRETS
you found yr lighter in yr cleavage and said so that's where you've been all my life
Randomize
