Is this a definitive no? All is forlorn? Such is fine, but i'm drunk and a sucker for concrete answers
I just remembered we were doing butt clenching exercising with bar straws last night
so my doctor just swabbed my throat, and he looked up in suprise when i had no gag reflex. yea, he just judged me.
wait do you know what youre gonna say if they ask how youre getting back?
yes. helicopter.
My sink just fell out of the wall. I can't deal with this right now
Yeah I mean its Vermont, not like id be the first guy to trade pharmaceutical services for beer
we have to top last new years. except im not ready for jail. that can wait a couple years
Sorry I can't go bowling with you guys. I'm getting daytime dick. That's the best kind.
Did you really get 12 corn dogs from the gas station last night?
COME HERE WE MELTED A CORONA BOTTLE WITH FIREWORKS
Kyle found me outside his apartment in the hallway. Said he didn't hear me knock bt smelled alcohol through the door. I'm sucha bitch to my liver
I need an IV, a new head, and stronger morals.
Just whatever you do, don't neglect the balls.
I'm at the gym. I've taken enough caffeine to feel inspired to be a low budget instagram fitness model. I totally forgot my push up bra though
I was just at the gas station and happened to look left and see a girl blowing some guy. How was your night?
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