So I just had this crazy idea, and no it has nothing to do with the fact that they made me take shots at work.
i love my job...i have craft hour at my desk w twizzlers
can u grab me a application
I told her I had to go to work this morning, got fully dressed in a suit, walked her out, drove around the block, parked, and walked right back in my apt and went back to sleep..
I saw an Asian dude carrying a patchwork denim purse get into a car with two rednecks at the grocery store tonight. Imagine what I could have seen if I had actually done something interesting.
I was to drunk to walk in jimmy john's so I called and got a pickle delivered to me outside the bar , too much?
Fuck you asshole. You cost me cheerleader pussy.
I FINALLY GET TO MASTURBATE. SO EXCITED.
Do you rver get that feeling like their are poprocks filling ur boday?
She definitely peed in a bucket in their closet last night. We should warn them about that, right?
your girlfriend showed us your homemade porn last night.
I'm 4,715,723% sure I don't give a fuck.
"Fwd: Nice to meet you last night thanks for the tit flash" no recollec. i am officially banned from wearing tube tops to the bar.
I'm glad you threw up in my bed because now we talk.
rowboat hit a rock. taking on water. going down fast. bring cheerios.
aye aye capn
he's figured out my code; what are you doing = I haven't found a better dick yet
Randomize
