The new Black Eyed Peas song is the stupidest shit I've heard since the last Black Eyed Peas song.
we'll go far in life on tits alone.
Haha im Trying. This detox stuff tastes nasty. It's bad when the only thing that came to mind when i took the first sip was how good it would be with Vodka
no seriously, she's legit pissed i'm late to lunch because i was watching full house. there's obviously no future here.
You had us pull over so you could pee, you proceeded to pee in some random persons front yard while yelling "im not ashamed"
Ya well here is the deal with last night, it was the Biggest shit show we have ever co-stared in.
I ended up at these random girls' house they are smoking weed out of a gun
Is adulthood just morning sex and then walking through the grocery store 20 min later looking for something to take to work for lunch?
...and then running into your dad at said grocery store...
What's the procedure for answering a booty call from someone under house arrest?
You aren't truly friends with someone until you play drinking games via text at 8:30 in the morning.
Mind if I sleep with your cousin? If I can... thanks. If no, sorry its gonna happen.
Apparently it's not a "bonding moment" when you realize you use the same porn site as your boyfriend
I'm like 'WOMAN, YOU'RE 62, RESHEATH THOSE COUGAR CLAWS.'
Sustenance and doggy style.. the only two things I need
Do you remember what happened last night? All I could find we're phone numbers of strip clubs in Detroit. Did we go to Detroit?
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