I seem to have left my pride at pride
So he says he needs "alone time" a day that he doesnt have to deal with anyone. should i be concerned?
I think in guy language thats " Im fucking someone else and dont want u catching me"
He just said "I made some changes in my life. The male g-spot is in the rectum and I wanted to explore that."
Have you ever looked at the 750mL bottle of wine on the seat next to you knowing that it's just not going to be enough?
Each and every day.
I just kept pointing at random people and telling the bartender to put it on their tab.
My overnight senior got drunk and hooked up with Kaylee on Sunday. I checked Facebook and he already put down his deposit for next year. This school should pay me a commission.
There's always the 'not have sex with the drunk girl I just met at some party' option.
That was the plan but Tequila showed up at the party too.
I mean how do you tell a nurse in the ER that you dislocated your knee giving a blowjob to your boyfriend.
Very innocently.
Waking up to find your mom holding your birth control pills and telling you I suggest you take this
She was bending and I said "finally, about time". Wrong, she was tying her shoe. No blowjobs for me.
I forgot how easy it is to have sex in public when you're wearing a dress. Thank you global warming.
I'm mortified. After he finished, he turned to me and said,"So, what did you think of my mom?" WTF Please tell me he was not wondering about that while he was going down on me!!!
I just want nice things and good sex
He told me to be a woman and make him dinner. So I threw a bagel at him and went out to dinner.
Taking a shit in a Texas 7/11... not accepting phone calls now lol
Randomize
