Sry I called you an 8
U r making out with a 12 year old get ur shit together
Next weekend I am getting a library card and staying my whore ass home.
on of the only things i remember was the security guard told me i was too drunk for laser tag.
Left for charity run at 5AM. Saw a pigeon eating last night's vomit and a pair of shame-walkers in high heels. Nature at it's finest.
I just remember taking her cat for a walk around 3 am then falling asleep in a slide at the park
hey give me heads up if you're feeling vulnerable tomorrow night
We invited our waitress tonight to come too.... we told her she had lightning in her veins and in return she taught us a Texas Roadhouse dance so the logical next step was invite her to a kegger.
Gregs sitting in the living room in his underwear hitting the bong watching a rob schneider movie. His lack of fuck giving is inspirational
i think you may have a shot to cock block in a moment. just saying.
Wake up an cock block please bc these are noises i dont ever want to hear again
And also the fact that I woke up sandwiched between two gay men is probably fueling my day
At the very least, I mastered a nap while occasionally being dry humped.
I got drunk by myself and ended up listening to Beethoven in the dark.
I just added Tubthumping to the playlist for tonight. This is going to make or break the party.
It's Friday you fucking nerd of course I'm drunk.
Randomize
