My room should be renamed "Land of the Misfit Condoms."
The problem with having your drunkeness documented at a wedding is not only does it show up all over facebook, but all over professional photography websites.
just chugged some gatorade and threw it up. todays gonna be awesome
if i find out your the one who pierced my belly button im going to fuck your sister again
You were fucking on a porch at a party, not much privacy should be expected
It was pathetic and I was covered in butter
he had me stop mid-blow job to make me use my phone to id a song on the radio..
i wasnt really sure how to responde to that.
I just baptized the girl next to me. LONG LIVE THE CHURCH OF VODKA
Oh wow. I almost tweeted #TweetFromTheBackOfACopCarTuesday but I didn't think it was that appropriate
lets talk about you, dubstep, and a bunny suit.
Suspicion confirmed. my mom has her nipples pierced
Way to crack the case Nancy Drew
that was the most beautifully crafted sentence ive ever read that involved the phrase "genitals or whatever"
STOP PUTTING BUTTER ON MY FUCKING CAT
yeah the cops just showed up and they got there ass handed to them at beer pong.
Well I've always wanted to get head while playing WoW...
K I'll do it, but mine is going to be WAY weirder. Your not allergic to shellfish, right?
Randomize
