tweet Hawks Win!! tweet
That's how twitter works, right?
I am not speculating about which disney princesses do and do not have gag reflexes
he wanted me to put the condom on for him. I was high and couldn't figure it out.. so instead we played xbox.
hotel security told us you walked into the hotel with blood all over your dress, weren't wearing any underwear and were escorted back by three men who were believed to be "homosexuals".
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You did this to me with your delicious pizza and moonshine.
I'll forgive you once we're drunk again by noon.
fuck your need to drink for whitney a thousand times last night.
and a jello shot exploded in my bra last night. Now I have blueberry smurfette boobs. Awesome.
The goal for tonight is vagina. In and around. Doesn't matter who. How. Or why.
You Just stopped dancing, looked at me and said "I'm gonna make it rain" Then shook the open box of crunch berries everywhere.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Like, she can be the shepard of the gays. Delivering him unto homosexuality.
I'm gonna hop on that dick and ride it into the sunset
...I think I just watched a boy make a sandwich seductively. What.
I wore my Gollum shirt. It struck up a conversation AND got him staring at my boobs. That's a win-win.
I was masterbating to some porn on my phone and my mom decides to text me "are you okay?" I mean i was doing great until you cock blocked me mom..
Beer. Pizza. Seething Rage. I will be full of two of these things tonight. You get to decide which two.
Randomize