I would really like to get high with Bill Nye. I'm being dead serious. Every step I take is literally a step I take because it will take me closer to Science Guy high.
We could get him to build Inspector Gadget.
I didn't know you were high TOOOO!!!
Dude..TWLOHA day. gonna write LOVE on my arms before going to the bar tonight. its like a pussy guarantee.
you made wolf sounds and yelled "team me" the entire movie
you don't seem to understand just how much pasta i spilled on my bed last night.
Just threw up in my seat during the national anthem. Probably not good.
I'm glad we have the kind of friendship where if either of us is too drunk to fuck a hot guy, we pass the responsibility to each other and get the job done.
I just re read that. We really need to get our lives together.
He just kept pointing to each of us saying "arrested, arrested, arrested"
She was giving you that "I really want to blow you but I have to act professional" look. Guaranteed
We're gonna go drive around campus and throw water balloons at all the drunk bitches wobbling around, wanna come?
When I ask you to make sure no ones coming while I'm changing.. The logical friend would keep watch. But you my, best friend come stand in front of me and flash everybody.
Hate sex is good. Drunk sex is better. Combine those two however and you get the best experience of your LIFE.
In local news, attempts to hide phone from extremely drunk self prove unsuccessful for Dallas woman.
Man, you got so high you own goaled yourself in FIFA then got up celebrating.
Started out playing table tennis then ended up fucking him on the table. Happy cinco de mayo
Bringing my mom Taco Bell and weed. I'm such a good daughter
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