I think men at large are the problem in most or all relationships. It's like trying to drag a three-legged retarded puppy through an obstacle course
U know those big foam mats in the back gym for track?
ya, gonna go have sex there?
No I want one to have wings and pick me up and take me home
Just saw a car with license plate GYPSYS that was full of gypsies
So he just rolled over in his sleep and said "that's a punctuation mark..."
While you were in the ER we decided to tailgate in the parking lot until security told us that's not allowed.
I probably looked like a mental patient. I had my IV in one hand and cup of pee in the other, swaying around with a dazed grin on my face. I love vicodin.
On the oral sex Super Bowl board I drew 7 and 1. If I get lucky, someone will be swallowing during Madonna's half time. I'm sure she'd approve.
He purred while eating me out. HE PURRED AND I LIKED IT.
Jk. Anyone who everbeers with me is my type.
Glow Paint looked great for the Black Light Party last night, Tonight having a glow in the dark Pizza on my arm, not so much.
I need a nap, Harry Potter movies, and dick in this exact order after work.
The magician guy on probation is here at the bar. I'm gonna get him to show me a trick
I just gave my boss a blowjob. underneath his desk at work. that promotion is mine!
eating a weed cupcake with nutella on top at work. i AM a star!
I just got fed by 3 guys. I love my job.
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