my dad just encouraged me to do a kegstand
lets have sex before this no shave november shit gets outta hand.
You had a towel around you and you called it your shot bib.
He literally had a note from his doctor saying he wasn't allowed to finger me for a week
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We lived together for a year and neither of us knew we were both gay.
Swear to god our friendship has its limits. Stop peeing on the fucking refrigerator.
I still count it as showing your tits. Even though the wall was the only one who saw anything. Your boyfriend was pissed.
Se wrote an essay in class about proper and fashionable winter wear for dogs. Of course I regret fucking her.
I went with plan f. get drunk and start a fire in my yard
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So I bought that bathing suit yesterday and got buyers remorse so I returned it today and then stole it. Win win.
You were cussing me out in sign language, and slurring your signs.
That's some kind of record drunk there...
i guess "never drinking again" is not an option when you invent a whole new level of drunk...
I found half a candy bar in my bra today... Melted to my nipple. What a mess. It was still good though.
Periods are much less exciting when you're not sexually active.
Her pegging playlist is all heavy metal so stay away if you wanna keep your ass intact
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