I'm playing musical beds - it's not very fun
took him home. told him i would rock his world. passed out. a for effort f for follow thru
Apparently I called 911 everytime Sean Kingston told me to
Just did the walk of shame across state lines...milestone?
just hooked up with an air force officer in a hotel room paid for by the military. i feel like i should go around thanking taxpayers for the assist.
It's happening again. I feel like I'm under water and my heart beat matches "Teenage Wasteland"
Just finished texting the 27th male name in my phone that i don't recognize. none of them were the hott kid i made out with last night. the search continues.
filling out my bracket based on schools with ppl I've hooked up with
It was really weird walking into a CVS and not going straight to the pharmacy for plan B.
I'm not wearing underwear, I started my period this morning, and it's super windy. Recipe for disaster?
Every time I roll over in bed I land on a different vibrator. I feel I'm the only one with this problem.
She pulled vodka outta the dryer and told me to drink it
Am I really that high, or did I just spray febreeze outside ?
I am about to embark upon a south Boston wedding....
Hydrate.
STAY IN YOUR APARTMENT. DONT GO TO SAFEWAY TO BUY CONDOMS. DONT GO TO THE VAN.
Randomize
