in my opinion joe jonas is kinda pointless. hes just the pretty boy front runner.
So he passed out in the bathroom of the bar, woke up thinking he was somewhere else and called her flipping his shit because he thought she left him. She had to go into the men's bathroom to find him, and then he told her she was "trying too hard to be his girlfriend" over and over again.
Dont they live together now? Havent they been together for like two years?
Yeah. That's the best part. I always thought he was kind of a pussy but turns out he's a degenerate just like us. Welcome
turns out the guy i was dating because he was a cop was not actually a cop. i learned this as he got arrested by real cops.
if you don't go to jail tommorow I'll buy you a 40. Motivation.
Well he paid for dinner, so I paid for the Plan B, but the parking ticket I got is totally his responsibility.
as it turns out, there is no "i was in the pool" excuse for adderall-induced shrinkage.
You turned byob into bring your own shit show. Good work.
Realistically anyone can come I don't care it's Boston what do I own boston? No. I just don't want people who are gonna give me "why are you doing that" kinda look when I take birthday shots out of my birthday babe shot glass necklace.
I heard him say "bet you won't", look over 10 seconds later and she's blowing him.....looked eloquent under the glow of a camp fire.
okay have fun. but Under NO circumstances ever attempt to outdrink the german exchange student. no matter how badly you want to blow him. just don't.
See,its just the last time this situation happened I ended up hiding in a closet on my birthday
Had to snap chat three different people to ask who left the bite mark on my thigh. All three said "Wasn't me". Now I can't wear a bathing suit to my mom's pool.
I'm serious-it was like trying to deep-throat a minivan.
Why are there 17 orders of shrimp lo mein in the bathtub?
Umm I might be late. Also I am may or may not have mayonnaise on my ass
Randomize
