well that one time I was being a total idiot trying to see how much I could drink. turns out 22 shots is too much. surprise surprise! ambulance party!
I am currently trying to use a tide to go pen to remove the jizz from my backseat, it's not working...
Is it weird for a girl to post pictures of her dildo no facebook?
The most interesting things happen to you when your pants come down. I truly envy you.
sometimes i think life is slapping me across the face and laughing, saying "ha ha! you're an adult!"
we're almost there. Shes pounding on the car window telling the nurse whos on a smoke break to fuck off.
she called for a booty call so i sent mike as my stunt double
my professor saw me buying beer for the super bowl and said go patriots. thats how i know im getting an A in his class.
We are without power. He took ALL the lightbulbs out and hid them.
But he does seem to be getting proper humping etiquette down. So there's progress.
Hey, if I'm gonna bastard a child and ruin his life, I'm going balls out.
I just watched my mom get dick on Skype.
That d should have definitely been an s.
Wanna get really high and go on a Valentine's Day Sexathon cause we're both single or would that be weird?
My new dealer was watching Space Jam and eating ham off a frisbee when I went over. He's my new favorite person
Only if I get to be Gritty
How would you be Gritty for a fantasy hockey league?
Don't worry about it.
Randomize
