Is it bad everytime a fat person orders fraps I want to tell them to slow their rolls
I like to use the word "seasoned" over "slutty", you know, like a good curly fry
I felt like a fire hydrant the vomit just kept coming out
He was in me and said I can't believe this happened because of facebook. MOOD KILLER.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just found out my mom named me after her fake ID from college...
I don't think going to Relay for Life and painting our faces while everyone stares at us is a sufficent late night after the bars.
apologized to him about 10 times for being drunk. told him about 15 times that he was "really pretty"
Speaking of ejaculate, did you get the side of your car cleaned off?
She said she'd heard about my nickname in high school. Apparently sledgehammer isn't as popular as you'd believe...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Remember when we partied so hard that dude died and it cockblocked you hooking up with my sister?
I forgot that happened. That's the second dude that died on a vacation I've been on
Whoa, I am aware of WAY too many squirrels right now...
I sent "Rawrrrr" to 151 matches on Tinder. I feel like thats a substantial size of the DC female population.
We can get high as fuck when there are no orders. If not its cool. I just figured Take Your Blunt Buddy To Work Day.
Last night i walked into a gas station to get condoms. I threw them on the counter and the guy gave me a funny look because i was wearing a bra under an open cardigan and no shoes. I screamed "DONT JUDGE ME!" and he gave them to me for free.
Just let a guy I just met eat me out in a shed at a baby shower. May have sunk to a brand new low
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