Flying into Chicago for a few days, getting re-deployed in September, we should probably fuck
Kristina got the same text from you just now, she's sitting next to me, how many people did you send this to?
God I'm so bored. I wish I had a baby or something to play with.
And this is exactly why you should NEVER have kids.
I heard that if you win you get to have sex with me. You guys really need to stop wagering my vagina.
They said an hour before I even see a doctor...and they noticed the shots tally on my arm.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
New Halloween costume idea: Frankenstorm. We have three hours. Make it work.
I want to be stormed in. I want to be stuck there. I want to climb a pyramid of strippers to safety
I'm making him come over again tonight. I don't know how long this thing will last so I want to spend as much time with his dick as possible.
He asked me how france is treating me
Tell him you got so much dick you may never come back to the US. That ought to keep him away
Sweet tea and masterbation. It's how I manage.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is she okay?
She may want to issue revenge punches, but medically fine.
We peed together in a dark alley while holding hands. That is a bond that can never be broken.
I think my nap took me to another dimension
The 666th photo in my phone is of him and if that's not a sign that he's secretly the Antichrist, idk what is. Also, bring more rum.
Well, I like big penises but it's not like he walks around with it out or anything so yes I think he has beautiful eyes
But once you are just right and I work my tongue in the right spots and hot wax your balls and inner thighs. I will have you right where I want you.
Who is this?
Oops wrong number
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