im 80% sure the guy across from me is taking pictures of my legs
Hard to imagine a reason apart from blow jobs that I'm awake at 530 am.
this is like black Friday for my dealer. I'm literally standing in line.
And for your info. Don't pee outside with glow sticks. People will still see you.
i'm moving back early just in case the freshmen need a tour of the school
oh right the one that ends on your bed
Preparing for thanksgiving at home now by chugging bourbon. Less than a month to train!
I recommend just blowing him. It's always the way to go.
P.S. It's common courtesy to let the girl your banging know if she's about to walk into the same place your girlfriend is at so she can get her poker face ready
He brought a TOOTHBRUSH and TOOTHPASTE with us on our date..... I want to go home and forget I ever decided to be nice and go on this date in the first place...... A TOOTHBRUSH!?!?!
No, we got so into acting out our role play characters we didn't even fuck. still sucess.
Hey. There is naked girl with "plz don't touch her. She just turned 21" sharpied on her chest. What happened last night?
I'm beginning to think the entirety of my appeal is due to the size of my ass.
Apparently I called him, said "vodka" and then hung up on him.
He dated a girl who could do the damn splits on his dick like how do you compete with that
he came with me to get plan b but they didn't have any. when I started crying he said "come on it's not that bad.. ill go get sandwiches from the vending machine and we'll have our first meal together as a family"
Randomize
