i love my job...i have craft hour at my desk w twizzlers
can u grab me a application
Lol i'z typing this with my 962 nose
962=my?
Yeah.i
my ex just saw me in his brothers bed. fuck yes revenge feels good
He showed me a four inch blond hair that grows out of his side. He calls it his little ray of sunshine. Please come get me.
Just used a champagne bottle to outline a trigonometric circle for math 104.. should i give up on life now or later?
She made me cum so hard I couldn't hear for half an hour after
we should hire that guy that makes pancakes that we met last weekend for our next party. He can feed us, and regulate!
Well it looked like you were having a fucking apiphany sitting at the toilet with a t shirt around your head
I just tried to eat one of my ear plugs, thinking it was a cheese curl. I need it to be break RIGHT NOW.
Dude you took some guys glasses off his face and ran out of the bar
That's true because who the fuck doesn't love Harry Potter and beer
The only thing about him that I appreciated was that he destroyed the bathroom at your birthday and missed singing to you. And we all knew.
Remember that cop that blew me in the parking lot a few weeks ago? He's possibly with his wife and kids shopping at Target.
You can call me ugly and you can call me fat,but don't you EVER say my meme game is weak.
i'm the most scandalous girl at stop and shop. i kinda have to fuck him in the meat cooler.
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