It's like a parade of train wrecks.
somethin' about having sex in my parents bed makes me feel like l'm finally an adult.
so my dad walked in on us having sex
lulz really? why?
lets just say he wont be answering to 'daddy' for a loooooong time
Ya know, years from now when that kid is old enough, I'll get to regale him with the story of how I was his father's AND uncle's first gay experience.
I dont think yelling "Grab your dicks, time for pics!" helped your case either.
He told me he's not in to anal. I need to marry him, ASAP.
Between my vag yelling at me for having bad sex and my legs yelling at me for going to the gym I cant hear myself think.
New low: just got woken up by my 9 year old cousin throwing an empty at me and telling me to get my life together.
I went to bed at ten on a Friday night I have virtues to spare
Either that or he's gagged in a strangers trunk right now.
Well I suppose either way he's learning a pretty tough lesson right now.
They're either celebrating their tax money or trying to kill each other.
Just checking to make sure you weren't kidnapped, pregnant or watching Fox News.
She won't let me meet her hot new boy toy just because she thinks it'll lead to us having a threesome. It's not fair. I thought we were friends...
Went to the party dressed like a Cougar and brought a twenty something dressed as Micheal Phelps home. So far I’m loving being divorced. :-)
Yeah. Of all the things to be cock blocked by a plague is the most unexpected.
Randomize
